The 4 Types of Attachment Style

If you dated a few times you can agree with me that some people are different than others. some of them act differently and everyone has their uniqueness, right? but they are not so different 2010, DR. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller published a book called “Attached” and in this book, they split those people into 4 groups of attachment

That’s how they could predict every attachment style action in each stage of the relationship.

This science is amazing so let’s dive right into those attachment styles

The Avoidant

Everyone has a friend who always says: “I’m better off alone” or “I don’t need help from anybody”

those people are the avoidant type, they want a relationship but are too scared for commitment, or once things get too serious they shut themselves down and suddenly keep their distance from their partner those people are often “lonely travelers” and laugh at commitment or dependency, that's normal for those people and that's how they live now

The Secure

The secure type is the one that everyone wants to be. He doesn't fear commitment, he is reliable and trustworthy. He doesn't avoid relationships or intimate moments or make drama from the little things this is the best type we can be, we are awesome for our partners and it is fairly simple to date with

Where the attachment styles come from

Before we get to the last attachment type we need to understand where it comes from. We are not born with our attachment style and can change it, the way we live, our life experiences, and the way we are treated as a baby

if you learn through life that you are not safe with the people around you. you will probably have an avoidant attachment style if your parents took good care of you and were there for you in every need, you would grow to be a secure type of person

The Anxious

that leads us to the anxious attachment, Those people overthink, take things seriously, and are in constant fear of being abandoned, They have amazing emotional intelligence and they can read people very well

The disorganized

The last type is a mix of the anxious and the avoidant they are scared of rejection and their actions are very confusing, this is a very hard-to-date type unless you are very secure

Important: it can always change

Your attachment style isn’t set for forever, it can always change, every life experience changes it a little, just slowly learn to trust people and feel safe around them

You can be Whoever you want if you put enough work into it